Ach I have not been very diligent about the upkeep of my blog! I also, honestly, have not been very active in the kitchen, but that is soon to change!

And so here I am, a month removed from tragedy, gathering myself together and trying to resume what was once my life; yet, these breaks in consistency are not meant to be fixed and hidden. As much as I would love to return to where I once was, that life is now only a figment of my imagination. When I was younger, I was afraid of change and tried so desperately to hold onto the comforts of the familiar. Change meant confrontation with the unknown, and the unknown meant that all possibilities could be waiting. On one hand, there was a gleaming brightness, on the other, an unclear bramble. Rather than arming myself with optimism and venturing forth hoping for the best, I was obstinate and chose to resist either future for as long as I could.

My mindset has since changed, or at least I would like to think that it has, because of the people that I have been fortunate enough to grow close to in the past ten years. With every new relationship formed, or with those that fade away, a change occurs. Being open to a new friendship, new love or any connection is a vulnerability that leaves one exposed to a spectrum of fears and hopes. And while not all of the relationships that I have developed and lost have been blissfully perfect, that is beside the point. We are not meant to know all that is waiting for us, or maintain the same lifestyle throughout our years. With each new event in our lives, the tragic or the exuberant, we are changed. There is no difference whether one is accepting of it at the time or not, that mark in your life will affect you, it is just when you realize this that you can grow from it.

So, change has brought me here. In my constant self revision I am at this particular moment a bit lost, but happy. Because despite the sadness that has tinged my life and others’, this change has grounded me. And I have to be open to it, because the longer I sit here resisting change, the longer it will take for me to find meaning in it.

With my rather dismal kitchen performance lately, I, of course, had to reenter the arena with a bit of sweetness. I received this awesome little cookbook for pocket pies for Christmas and I had been oggling the recipes for the last two months without even attempting one, so it was the perfect place to start! I will admit that I did not end up making homemade crust solely because I wanted to make the pie and eat it as soon as possible. I highly encourage making your own crust though because it adds another delicious dimension of perfection. I settled on making a free form pear and ginger pie, which is basically like a homemade Poptart, and even with the store bought pie crust it was pretty yummy! I tweaked the original recipe slightly by using fresh, rather than ground, ginger and also using molasses, which gave it a nice spice. Next time when I’m not dying for sweets, I will definitely make my own crust and also serve the pie with a scoop of ice cream :).


Pear and Ginger Pocket Pie – serves two (adapted from Handheld Pies)

1 bosc pear; 1 pie crust; 1 egg; 2 teaspoons sugar; 1 teaspoon dark molasses; 1/2 teaspoon chopped fresh ginger

Preheat your oven to 375° F. Thinly slice the pear and put them in a mixing bowl. Add the sugar, molasses and ginger and mix thoroughly. Let the mixture sit for about twenty minutes until the juices from the pear begin to release and there is a nice brown syrup. Next, divide the pie crust into two semi circles and fill with the pear filling. Seal the mini pies and crimp the edges with a fork. Lastly, add an egg wash by whisking the egg and brushing the pie crusts with it. This will add a nice glossiness to your pies for a bit of an aesthetic touch. Place the pies on parchment paper or a greased cookie sheet and slide them into the oven. The pies are done when the crusts are golden, about 15-20 minutes. Let them cool slightly for about ten minutes, or as long as you can resist, and then serve them up!


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